life. and everything in between

A couple months ago I was driving home from school and I was STRESSING. To. The. MAX. For me that is normal, unfortunately . I am a planner and a doer which in less flattering terms means I am a worry wart. I want my life to go as I have planned. I want to know the future. I want to have my bills paid BEFORE they are due. I want to be in control. Have you noticed all the "I's"? I was busy driving and telling God what I thought was going wrong and why He needed to show up on "my time" (Bold, yea I have a problem I heard very loudly, "Emily, if you don't trust me, do you even believe in me?"* Now my thoughts started racing in a whole other direction . I felt like defending myself, making excuses. Such as "whoa God! I didn't say that. You know that I need structure, you know I can't deal with this." But I stopped myself and just sat in the silence. I know that I believe but my actions say otherwise. It was a wake up call for me. ...

How about New Year, Better Me. How about New Year, Less of Me. How about New Year, more Jesus. I am how I am. I believe I was created with my personality because God wants to use me. I don't think He wants the nasty parts of me (I know, shocker, I am nasty), He wants for me to be better, to be great.  We were driving home from my parents house a few nights ago and Levi asked me if I had anything I had planed, goal wise, for 2016. I jokingly said "to survive." Okay maybe that isn't a complete joke. But really, I shared with him how since we moved I have felt an overwhelming presence of the Holy Spirit and I didn't want to lose that. I wanted to continue my devotionals and experience God in new ways. We both also talked about how we liked this path we were going to down of having less stuff. Since we decided to move we have been getting rid of things we have no use for. A majority of that was when we had to move our whole apartment into a 5X10 storage unit. That f...